hmmm...

here's the situation:

my life at the ranch will be 100% different when i get back here from our 2 week christmas break.... my house parents are leaving, camile and elizabeth are moving to the other girls house, and laura and lensa are going elsewhere to learn "independant living skills" with a couple who works here, and abby and i will live at laurel ridge all by ourselves and probably do odd jobs around the ranch (filing, answering the phone, pastor wood's radio show.....) unless abby decides to go home... then i'll live here all by my lonesome..... and be a bitter old maid for the rest of the year, because not one, but all five of my girls have or are soon leaving me, plus my house parents..... the past two weeks have introduced a lot of change into our lives and have been really hard, but after christmas, i anticipate it getting harder..... i miss arissa..... i miss her hugs and her i love you's...... i miss everything about her, and there's nothing that i do here that isn't hard for me because she's not standing next to me and holding my hand.... walking back to the house by myself after devotions is the hardest thing to do... everytime i open my second drawer and see all of our science kit stuff and all the experiments we were going to do, i tear up.... it's really hard, and truly, the only comfort i have is knowing that she is safe now and happier than ever with our Lord...... after christmas, all the joy that i have left in this house will be gone..... except for my seperated at birth twin sister, abby, who hopefully will stay here..... i'm praying, firstly, that i won't remain bitter, and i'll accept this as God's will and surrender to Him, and secondly that they'll assign me as camile's mentor and i can teach her english and whatever else...... if that's what God wants me to do, then i'll be very pleased, if not, i'll work hard, and learn to love what He has me doing anyways..... camile needs some stability and that's something she's seen very little of since she's been here..... i'm worried the most about her, because she really has bonded with our house staff, and is now being moved out..... i agree with zero percent of what i heard in meetings today, but it's not about me and what i want to do.... it's about God and what He wants me to do and what is best for these kids...... i hate change, and i've accepted a lot of it the past few months, and it's been hard, but i'll continue to accept it and deal with it with the Lord's help..... i pray that the girls and our house parents can do the same, and somehow see the hand of God in everything that has happened since thanksgiving and is still happening..... please pray for continued strength for this house that's grown so strong together the last two weeks, and is about to be separated........ it's gonna be a really huge transition for the 8 of us, and we each need your prayers so badly...... so that's the situation..... this is probably the last e-mail i'll send before i leave here, so cherish it, and please pray that we will joyfully surrender to God's will without question or bitterness....... i hope i see you all while i'm home (except for my maconites..... you'll have your chance sooner or later....) i love y'all and i thank you soooooooo-------> much for loving me and being so supportive through your prayers for these kids and for me.....

His,

anna kathryn

"i thank my God everytime i remember you.

in all my prayers for all of you, i always pray with joy."

-phil. 1:3-4