...in the ghetto

“...the image is one thing and the human being is another...it’s very hard to live up to an image.”

-Elvis Presley

Well... yesterday was Elvis’s 71^st birthday... it also was my little cousin JD’s 7^thbirthday... now, for the last 4 years, I’ve tortured my friends in whichever community I was living (Mercer or WVR) by throwing a birthday party for Elvis on January 8^th, and I’ve brought my life-size stand up of the king himself, however, this year my community consists of my immediate family members, and, obviously, we were planning on having a birthday party for JD, not Elvis... but he tagged along, and we had a good time, so tradition not broken! That is fantastic! You guys know how I am about traditions and anything sentimental... hahaha!

Anyways, in the twenty words I began this email with, the king of rock and roll fully expresses a feeling I’ve experienced a lot of recently... how convenient that I found a quote from ELVIS to start this email off with! That’s amazing! Here’s a question: Do y’all ever start to feel like you “over” making mistakes? Like you’re past that... maybe all those things the car salesmen say are true a little bit... Yeah, you tell them you’re not at all perfect, you’re a sinner just like the rest of us, but maybe a little part of you starts to believe them more and more everyday... and slowly, but not too slowly, you start feeling like you’re pretty much “over” making mistakes... Congratulations! YOU, and you alone, are the one and only person since Jesus Christ to accomplish living a perfect life... That’s incredible... You must be very proud! Be assured, you will do great things!

And then........... You make a big one! And then you make another one, and several more...... And then, suddenly, you become astonishingly aware of the daily mistakes you’ve been making all this time, and that you’re still making... whether it’s “internal mistakes” like distrust, or anger and hatefulness, or the easily identifiable “external mistakes...” they’re all there, making it impossible to live up to that Christ-like image you and the salesmen have created of yourself... oh well.... It’s useless... why even try?

Thankfully, we ARE human beings, and we ARE all sin filled, and we’re not expected to be perfect, because it’s an impossible goal to reach completely... the Lord is quick to remind us of this fact when we start feeling a little (or a lot) arrogant... He used circumstances and my own sinfulness to remind me, and then He backed it with Romans 3... however, being an unreachable goal by no means makes it a useless goal! %100 of the time our top goal should be to become more and more like Christ everyday! THAT is something we can accomplish and thrive at through enlisting the Lord’s help! The good news in all of this is that while we, being human and sinful by nature, make mistakes daily, God, being God and gracious by nature, loves us without compromise and is ready and willing to forgive our continual sinfulness... and when asked, He will undoubtedly assist us in becoming Christ-like and even though we make mistakes He will use us each to do great things FOR HIS GLORY! There’s no other way really...

Well... that’s where I’m at... it’s a pretty easy thing to jump back into reality when you work with at risk youth, because you’re constantly making mistakes in the way you handle situations and the way you don’t handle them... the moment you feel like you’ve got it, you quickly realize that you don’t at all, and it’s abnormally easy to recognize when that has happened... but I think and I hope that God is using me in some of these kids lives! They are fantastic and so much fun! I am very very blessed to know them all! The steps that we have seen some of our students take in the couple of weeks before Christmas break and this past week after are huge, and remind me of why I’m here! God is alive and at work in all of them and in each of us who work with them!

Thanks for praying for us, you’re a huge part of the success we see in these kids and a huge part of the reason we make it through each day! Y’all are wonderful! My most current prayer need is these two new students we have and their transition... and as always, the school and ranch as a whole, staff and students alike, that we represent God well and glorify Him everyday!

Keep in touch! I love y’all, really!

His,

Anna Kathryn

“I thank my God everytime I remember you;

in all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy!”

-Philippians 1:3

I’ll leave you with this:

“As the snow flies
On a cold and gray Chicago mornin’
A poor little baby child is born
In the ghetto
And his mama cries
’cause if there’s one thing that she don’t need
It’s another hungry mouth to feed
In the ghetto

People, don’t you understand
The child needs a helping hand
Or he’ll grow to be an angry young man some day
Take a look at you and me,
Are we too blind to see,
Or do we simply turn our heads
And look the other way?”

-Elvis Aron Presley, In the Ghetto

haha, wow, a lot of you just laughed I’m sure, that song holds a lot of ridiculously funny memories for me and most people who know me... but it really is pretty telling...

at JD's party, his little sister, elise, 4, looks at Elvis and asks me: "Why isn't that the real Elvis?"

me: "Well... we're not sure he's really still alive..."

elise: "He's alive...."

me: "why do you think that?"

elise: "well I hear him singing on the radio..."

faith that can move mountains

Sunny days seem to hurt the most.
I wear the pain like a heavy coat.
I feel you everywhere I go.
I see your smile, I see your face,
I hear you laughin' in the rain.
I still can't believe you're gone.

The first time I heard this song, every line made me think of Arissa more... Obviously it applies, but every new line took me back to a single moment or a hundred different moments that I spent with her... Let's talk about my friend Arissa... I literally can still close my eyes and see her sweet face smiling at me... The face she made right after she said "I love you" or "blu blu."** Her eyes a little squinchy, her head tilted... It's a picture I'll never forget. Then her sweet face turns into her scary face, and , wow, there are no words... at that point, her laughter echos in my head... both her normal laughter, and her eyes crossed, fanning her face funny laughter... I still can't believe she's gone....

It ain't fair, you died too young,
Like a story that had just begun,
But death tore the pages all away.
God knows how I miss you,
All the pain I've been through,
Just knowin' no-one could take your place.
Sometimes I wonder,
Who'd you be today...

One year ago today Arissa left her home in Indiana to return to her home in Tennessee, but ended up at her home with Jesus... Today is her first birthday in Heaven! I am celebrating for her today and I hope you'll join me! I don't know what Arissa would be like if she were still with us today, but I imagine she would be an 11 year old version of the same kid she was a year ago... smiling, laughing, making us laugh, but tormented emotionally... She'd still have that knubbie, and I'm sure she'd still spend a lot of time in that corner... But, just as she grew every day that I knew her, I imagine she would still be growing closer to the Lord, and healing more and more all the time... That's who I imagine Arissa would be today, if she were still alive... Now let's talk about who Arissa is today! I'm certain that she's smiling, laughing, and making everyone around her laugh all the time... She has five perfect fingers on her hand, she's never in the corner, and she hasn't experienced any emotional torment for a year! She's closer to the Lord than she ever was or could be here, in fact, I bet she's holding His hand and saying "blu blu"** to Him right this very moment, and as of a year ago, she's completely healed of all emotional and physical harm that she ever experienced. That is amazing and the greatest picture imaginable of the incredible grace of God!

Man, I miss her so much... everyone who knew her does... we've all cried, we've all felt like it's not fair, she was too young... Her story was just beginning... The truth is, God had something better for Arissa.... It's completely fair, she is an amazing child! Her life here was not fair, but the Lord took her away from that life early on... Her story had just begun, ten short years prior... death tore all of those hard and sad pages away, and filled her new story with great things and the incredible reality of being in God's amazing presence! That is a wonderful story... a best-seller! and even better, God wants to fill our stories with those same pages, and one day our new pages and Arissa's new pages will intertwine! I cannot even fathom greatness to that extent, but one day I'll live it, and then I'll understand...

Sunny days seem to hurt the most.

I wear the pain like a heavy coat.

The only thing that gives me hope

Is I know I'll see you again someday.

I praise God for that little girl every day, and will continue to until the day we're reunited... In the 81 days I knew her, she taught me more about life, the changing and renewing power of God, and death than I could have learned in a lifetime...

Arissa's death marks the start of the most difficult few weeks of my life... When I think about it like that, I know I would never never willingly relive those few weeks... never.... But Arissa's death also marks the start of huge growth in my life... When I look at the way the Lord used that tragedy and the hard times that followed to strengthen me and bring me closer to Him, I would relive those weeks as many times as I needed to... I'm learning to make sure I don't just praise God and recognize His grace in really great times, but to dig deeper to see how God's grace is continual, as He constantly floods us with His love and guidance through the hard times that He let's us experience... They're not times to feel angry at God or cheated, but they're times to experience closeness to God like you've never known!

Please keep Arissa's family in your prayers today and this week, and keep Arissa's friends and housemates up in TN in your prayers also... It's a hard time for us, but praise God that it's a time of celebration for her!

Friends... Family... Students... haha, that's how I address the classroom.... Speaking of the classroom, please, please, please keep these ER kids in your thoughts and prayers as they return from Thanksgiving break today, and as they go home for Christmas break in a few weeks... and praise God for revealing His grace in their lives by bringing them to the ranch! I love all of you so much! Keep in touch, and thanks for your prayers!

His,

Anna Kathryn

"I thank my God everytime I remember you;

in all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy!"

-Philippians 1:3

**"blu blu" is our secret language for "I love you!"

Then the disciples came to Jesus in private and asked, "Why couldn't we drive it out?"

He replied, "Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."

Matthew 17:19-21

thousands elsewhere...

"It's not that it's not grand enough... there's just something easy goin that I love about you and Tennessee..........

Part of me's in Tennessee, and deep down in my heart I miss my Smokey Mountain home, and I miss your lovin too,

and it's deep inside of me, and it's always gonna be,

cause this ain't Tennessee, and she ain't you...."

Wow! Garth captured my very heart when he sang those lyrics to me as I was driving home from an amazing three day visit to see my friends in East Tennessee and at WVR last weekend... Man, those kids are at the center of my heart and I feel so blessed that they are part of my life forever! Beautiful blue clear skies both days, an amazing full moon and a sky full of stars each night... That place is a vision of the power of God, and I pray that He takes me back there to live one day... That trip couldn't have come at a better time for me! I get so caught up in the discouragement I face daily at my jobs, and I tend to forget that God has the power to work in all situations and to change lives, and WVR is such a breath of fresh air and a reminder of what God does everyday!

I start to feel hopeless at ER, cause I don't see a lot of change in those kids lives... I see a lot of potential, but I also see A LOT of reluctancy on their parts to want to change, and that is the hardest part for me... My heart breaks every day, because I want them to succeed so badly, and, I mean really, it's been two and a half months, isn't that enough time to heal what 13+ years of trauma and emotional damage has done to these kids? Of course it's not... That is a completely ridiculous thought process..... Seeing my friends at WVR reminds me of what God can do in lives, it reminds me of what He's done in my life, and it restores my hope of what He is capable of doing in these ER kid's lives, in His own time frame... it took 22 years to get me where I am, and I definitely still have a long way to go!

A second thought I've had is that, while this isn't Tennessee, and none of these kids are those kids, Georgia is great, and these kids are fantastic... They put the biggest smile on my face every day, and I love them each so much... These middle schoolers are definitely some of the all time greatest people I know, they make me laugh so much and they are just each so precious to me.... I know that I am where the Lord wants me right now, and I believe that when you are following God and living in His will and not your own, He can and absolutely will use you to make an eternal difference in people's lives, as well as your own... At WVR on Tuesday morning, Brian and Maralee led us in worship, and as we stood singing "Better is one day in your courts than thousands elsewhere" I praised God for revealing His will to me, and bringing me to Georgia and Eagle Ranch... I could spend thousands of days in Tennessee, outside of the Lord's will, but surrounded by those kids and my friends up there who I love so much, and I would probably be very happy.... but better is ONE day in His courts!

Well... I have 28 praises and prayer requests for y'all... one for each of these kids I hang out with every day.... I'm so thankful for them and so truly blessed, and my prayer is that they open their hearts and their eyes to who God is and what He can do in their lives.... And pray that we, as a staff, are used in a mighty way, and that these kids see the love of God in and through us....

And praise God for giving me the internet, a phone line, and transporation so I can can keep in touch and visit WVR often!

I am so grateful for each of you and that God has provided me with a means to keep in touch with all of you as well! Thanks for always reading my babbling novels about my redundant struggles, and the Lord's continual grace... You're all in my prayers and I love you all very much!

His,

Anna Kathryn

"I thank my God everytime I remember you;

in all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy!"

Philippians 1:3&4

The best commentary I get these days are the one's that age me back to middle school.... They never cease to make my day....

"I feel comfortable talking to Miss Buffington, because it's like she's our age..."

-Amanda, 13

Talking to a 7th grader I hung out with while her parents were buying a car at the dealership... We're talking about visiting her church and youth group...

"Aww man! It's too bad you're not in middle school! Cause then you could come to our church service, and we get a live band!"

Cameron: "Miss Buffington looks like one of us today..."

Cody: "Yeah! Miss Buffington, you look like a pigtailed middle schooler!!"

"Awww, you look like a little school girl..."

-Ron, an adult...

hahaha, music to my ears....

comfortable...

well.... month 1 away from Wears Valley Ranch has come and gone.... it has been such a fast month and 4 days!! and an even faster month and 3 days that I've been working at Eagle Ranch!

it's been over a year since I've been in school... man, I said when I graduated from Mercer I would never go back to school.... but here I am..... I said I'd never live in Gainesville again after I graduated from high school... and here I am.... but......... the Lord said, "give me your future..." and I said, "it's yours..." so this is where He brought me... living in Gainesville, GA and teacher's aiding at Eagle Ranch school.... and this is where He's gonna use me... what an adventure! it's very exciting to step out in faith, forget your "I will never's" and fully surrender you life to God's will...

the first couple of weeks a this job were so hard for me.... I have never in my life been homesick, until I left East Tennessee and Wears Valley Ranch.... and the comfortable life of never having to drive my car, never buying food, amazing kids who I loved and will always love with all my heart, the incredible respect they showed me 100% of the time, and how loved they made me feel.... the comfort of 2 church homes, who invited me into their families, made me feel so welcome, and just taught me so much about the love of God and His righteousness... the ease of finding time in the day to spend with the Lord, because the whole day was a time of devotion spent with Him, from the time I woke up in the morning and went to devotions, prayed without ceasing all through the day, to the time I had devotions at night and went to sleep... that life was so hard and tiring for me for the first couple weeks, until I fell in love with those kids, and figured out that I was right where the Lord wanted me... and that life became so comfortable to me.... Wow, I miss it, so much...

a wise woman once told me that God will sometimes take us out of our comfort zone so we will continue to grow in our dependance on Him... my second day of work here, it was a monday.... 5 days after I got the call wednesday that I had to leave wvr thursday, and start a new job friday... I had cried everyday up to then, and would continue to cry everyday for the next week or so, but I came into work that day and my boss asked if I could meet with him after school... he wanted to sit down with me and discuss some reasons why he hired me, and some of my strengths and weaknesses... we had a great meeting, and at the end of it all he said, "You know, Anna Kathryn, another reason I hired you, really the main reason, is because, after a lot of prayer, I just really feel like you were called here, and that Lord has called you into this ministry...." Wow! the Lord knew that is exactly what i needed to hear at that very moment, and He put those words into Wade's mouth! i have thought about that sentence, and praised God that I'm here every day since then... being back in gainesville is a completely different world for me.... being back at Eagle Ranch is an even more different world... and working at the Honda dealership.... well.... that's another e-mail..... but all these three things have distanced me so far off from my comfort zone, and i find myself in a constant battle against discouragement and sadness, but the Lord brought me here, and I pray constantly that the Lord will use me here... these new kids are super.... for the most part they all treat me with great respect, and they're such fun to be around... i'm gonna ask y'all to pray for them, as like 22 of the 34 kids in the middle school are all still in their first month here, and many are still having a pretty hard time with having to be here... I know some of you WVR kids can relate to that, so please try to remember these new kids I'm hanging out with in your prayers.... we've seen several outbursts of anger, a fight, and a lot of defiance and lies, but we've also seen the Lord's hand at work in these kids, and they have grown immensly since I first met them! The Lord is so sovereign, and faithful to His children!

Wow, we are so blessed to be part of His family, and so often we don't even realize it or give any thanks for the great blessngs He lavishes on us daily.... that's one thing we try to make these kids aware of, but it's something that all of us struggle with remembering, and we need to make ourselves aware of it as well... I rarely even begin to recognize the great things He's given me, or the comfort and relief He provides me with daily... but it's constant... I'm reminded when I see these kid's smiles, or get emails from or talk to my friends at Wears Valley Ranch... I would encourage you to find some great thing or multiple things in your life, something you think about or encouter often, and let it be a daily reminder of God's amazing grace and His great love for you... praise God and thank Him everytime you remember that thing or things, because He doesn't have to bless you, but He wants to, because He loves you that much....

anyways, let me briefly (whatever, nothing is briefly) explain my new life to you: 9-2:30 I'm at eagle ranch para-pro-ing in the middle school science class room.... I basically make copies, grade papers, and play vocab games with the kids.... Wednesday I have a jewelry making class with two of the girls, which is great fun for me... we have 27 boys and 5 girls in the middle school, and everything works so differently from WVR but I've learned that this place is great for these kids, and WVR is great for those kids... we're catering to two different types of kids, and all of them are truly blessed to be here and we are all truly blessed to know each of them... anyways, after I leave here, I drive around or visit people I know until 4ish, then I head to Milton Martin Honda to answer the phone and take money for service tickets... I expected to be miserable at that job, but I think I have just as much fun there as I do at school, and I pray daily that the Lord somehow uses me in that place as well... Saturdays i'm at the dealership all day as well, except this Saturday, and I'm going to WVR, which is so exciting for me!!!!! here's some more exciting news... in a little more than a week I'll be in a new car, and I wont be hesitant to drive long distances (hahaha, and short distances...) again for a long time!! anyways... thats just a side note....

I'm finished here... I know it's been a little, while, and it'll probably be longer until the next one, I just wanted to give y'all another update on how the Lord continues to work out His great plan for me and for the different kids and people He puts in my life... thanks for reading all these rambling emails... if you've taken the time to read this far, I know you've taken the time to pray for us as well.... I love y'all!!

His,

Anna Kathryn

"I thank my God everytime I remember you;

in all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy!"

-Philippians 1:3-4

haha, oops, I was joking when I said I was finished, as you all well know, it doesn't end that quickly or easily.... here are some things that I have heard or read or done that have brought great comfort and joy and laughter to my heart:

"Now we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven, not built by human hands."

-2 Corinthians 5:1

"Miss Buffington's my favorite teacher..."

another time, the same kid: "Miss Buffington's my best friend..."

-Nick

"Jewelry making is my favorite time of the week!"

-Brittany

I threw the football today during break..... just once, but it made me think of you girls at Pleasant Hill....

"The guys and I were talking today and we decided that we just love you..."

-Butch, VP at my Honda dealership...

from the back of the lunch room:

Jonathan: "Miss Bufington, are you really a ninja?"

what? no... haha

David: "Yeah, she knows all those government ninja moves..."

.....the conversation continued through the rest of lunch.... i heard things like:

"Miss Buffington hit me over the head with a hammer..."

"She gave me this scar..."

"Watch out, Mr. Milwood, she told me you're next..."

"Miss Buffington, Jonathan, Nick, Brandon and I decided that you can't wear dangly earrings anymore, cause we think you're going to choke us with them..."

obviously, haha, none of these accusations are true.... but it all made for a lot of laughs at lunch today....

"my feet don't dance, but my heart does!"

"Whether you turn to the left or to the right,

your ears will hear a voice behind you saying,

"This is the way; walk in it."

Isaiah 30:21

I was asked recently how I've grown since this time last year... it's impossible for me to look back on this past year without tearing up right now... it's really hard to put myself back in those flip-flops, and think about my fears at that point and everything that has happened since then... This time last year I was terrified of coming here all by myself.... I was doubtful that I had what it takes to work with troubled youth... I was worried that I would burn all my meals, and lose every game at rec for my team... I was ready to call up Mr. Richard and say "why did you give me this job? couldn't you have hired somebody more fit for this kind of work? are you crazy? please... fire me... i know i don't start for a few weeks, but you should go ahead and fire me... really, you'll be doing the ranch a great favor..."

What if I had done that... what if i had never known Arissa... what if I had never flattened my tire that night, or had to say goodbye to the girls when they moved houses... what if I had never known James and Lindy or had to say goodbye to them, and live in this big house with no family.... what if i had never spent all those nights crying so hard i could barely see or breathe or had to say goodbye to emily, abby and margaret all as incredible roommates...what if I had never known what these kids have faced in their lives... what if i had never known this whole place, and never had to say goodbye to this family i have here and all of this that i love so much.... man, I could have saved myself a lot of tears!!

A wise man once said, "I'm glad I didn't know the way it all would end, the way it all would go........ I could have missed the pain, but I'd of had to miss the dance..." I would not be the person I am today if I didn't have those experiences! Praise God that He brought me here and didn't spare me from all of those things, etc, because He knew that I needed all of that to happen in order to make me more like Him, and to teach me to trust Him COMPLETELY! Not only have I grown through the hard times, but, man, God has poured out blessings on me since last August... A LOT has happened this year! A lot... If I could have foreseen what all would happen, and had opted out, I never would have met these incredible servants of the Lord who will all be part of my life forever... I would have missed out on soooo many fun times, and so much growth! I came here last August hoping and praying that I could make a difference in these kids lives... but I think the flip flop happened, because they have made such a difference in mine, and I am eternally grateful to my God and to each of them! There have been a lot of hard times and a lot of really great times that I will never forget. I thank God so much for everything he has done here this year, everything from taking Arissa away from this frightening world to be with Him, to hanging out in the kitchen cooking 75 eggs.... He continually moves in this place, and I know that what He's taught me here will continue to impact me forever.

I was not emotionally prepared to come here this time last year, and it took a lot of prayer to prepare me.... now, I'm not emotionally prepared to leave here... there has been no other time in my life that has been as fulfilling in any way than my time here, and I will miss every person, every child, and every moment dearly. But the Lord let me know this morning that it's time for me to go, and tomorrow, while i'm driving home, I ask y'all to pray hard for me... I'm a little overwhelmed right now.... there have been a lot of tears, but I know that the Lord has great plans for me and I will follow Him and trust Him fully....

Friday morning I start a new job at Eagle Ranch as a parapro in the science/history classroom at the school there... I am very excited and anxious to start this new journey... and I'm grief stricken and heart broken to leave this past year's journey... but I know I'll be back here and I know that God will provide the comfort that I need...

I can't begin to express my thanks to y'all for hanging around and reading these rediculously long and random novels, and most of all for your constant prayers. Each of you means so much to me. I can't promise that these e-mails will continue after this one.... but if I can find my way to a computer every now and then, I'll let you guys know what is up.... thanks for stickin by me through all of this and for your encouraging words and all of your prayers! I love each of you so much!!!

His,

Anna Kathryn

"I thank my God everytime I remember you,

in all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy!"

Philippians 1:3-4

great moments at my surprise leaving party today:

Harley: "Miss AK, what's your favorite animal?"

Me: "Deer."

Harley: "Aw man, you were supposed to say monkey!"

Me: "Oh.... let's start over..... Monkey!!"

Harley, very excited: "LOOK!!!"

....and he holds up a toy monkey!!!

Kristina: "We should have gotten Miss AK a teddy bear so she could say she saw a bear while she was here..."

.........a few minutes later........ David comes downstairs and gives me his teddy bear!!!!

in Eon's letter to me: "I wish my vocabulary was extensive enough to convey how much you mean to me.......... I think I will keep that cup forever!!!"

Quavi, pointing at the dolls Zachary gave me: "See, this is you, and this is your husband and these are all your children....."

Me: "Quavi, I don't have a husband...."

Quavi: "I know you don't... but you will one day...."

i felt very loved today!!! what a wonderful send off!!!

i think this is the moment many of you have been waiting for... (no, not the end of my e-mail.....) i'm announcing my webpage!!! I'm going to start selling my jewelry, and I made a webpage for it, so here's the link.... psalm421.tripod.com go look around... there are some kinks, but it's pretty exciting... let me know what you think!!

75 eggs... still learning!

"Cast your burdens upon Jesus, He caaaaares for you!

Lowa lowa, lowa lowa lowa lowa, lowa lowa,

stomp satan lowa!!"

ahh, the joy of camp songs..... makes me miss southwind!!

Well, friends... my time here is drawing to a close.... about five weeks left, or very possibly less...

And just to mix it up a little, it's July! Which means Camp Arrowood! The summer camp we have for all of July... for most ranch folk, this month means complete isolation, because there's not much we can do all together with the camp kids all over the place... but for me, this month means GREAT FUN! I am having so much fun! They've put me in the kitchen with our cook, who, for camp, cooks breakfast, lunch and dinner for 60-75 people Monday through Friday! so she needs all the help she can get, and I'm in there with her Monday through Friday... Monday and Tuesday I'm in Christopher House for school time also, so I'm still getting some exposure to ranch life... Camp lasts four weeks (it's half over), and I am just looking so forward to these next two weeks! On the weekends, I find myself strangely missing being in the kitchen... haha, it hasn't driven me to cooking for myself just yet though... but anyways, the camp kids are great, and our kids all are going to camp different weeks too, so i get to see them when they come through the serving line... it is crazy fun! and even crazier, I'm learning all of the cooking techniques of this amazing cook! So in 2 more weeks, I'll know how to cook meals for 60-70 people! but no more, or no less.... haha that's helpful...

anyways, we've got three new kids here at the ranch, and I want to ask y'all to pray for them and their transition into ranch life.... besides that, there's not too too much happening, beside camp, and church camps and mission trips and house vacations, which all are also things you guys could keep in your prayers, as these kids have the opportunity to minister to others and continue to learn more and more about their great Creator through different means...

He does have quite a many different ways to teach us things, doesn't He? Wow! What a rollercoaster ride! Throughout this year, I have shared with y'all much of what He's taught me here... I know it probably has sounded redundant a lot of the times, but every new thing has opened my eyes more to the greatness of God, and of His soveriegnty! And here I am again, with yet another lesson learned. This is gonna be a long one, y'all, maybe the longest one yet... I'm sorry, I hope you have time!!

The past couple of months have been great! they have just been so great! I have felt so close to the Lord, and have just been so happy. But... there's somebody who doesn't like that closeness, and will do almost anything to break it... yes, that's right, satan, the father of lies, started feeding them to me like never before! It was all very unusual, because in the midst of my happiness and peace, and just right in the midst of this great closeness to the Lord, there started to creep in these four lies in the shape of feelings of rejection, discouragement, hopelessness and impatience... they each had their share of wearing on me for a couple of days, but thankfully I serve a great God who, without fail, accepts me, encourages me, gives me hope, and is not only patient with me, but teaches me how to be patient as He works out His plan for my life.

Through differing circumstances recently, my walk has been wide open to hear and accept those four lies, and what I've learned is that God will allow that to happen, and you'll learn through them as you trust in Him. It's hard to refute those things by yourself... it's actually impossible, because the world will continue to reject you, but God will never reject you. You will never stop feeling discouraged by circumstances around you, but God has an amazing and soveriegn plan that includes each one of those circumstances! And the world leaves you little room for hope of better days... things just seem to get sadder, and smoggier, and meaner... but because Christ died for us, we can be filled with hope that God has this great place for us, full of smiles and clean air, families united in Christ for eternity and His unfailing love surrounding us! and lastly, waiting is hard, and we can't wait by ourselves, because we're constantly tempted to jump ahead, but God promises to bless those who wait on Him, and He is so faithful to fulfill His promises! So when we try to tackle these things on our own, we'll hit a dead end every time, but I've learned that when we look to the Lord for guidance, He will never fail to bring us to the truth!

Romans 14:3b

"...for God has accepted him."

This verse talks about the acceptance that the Lord offers to those high in faithfulness and those lacking in faith, but applies for all situations. I know that rejection is something that many people struggle with, and it's hard, but the truth is, none of us are rejected! Because the Lord has an open offer of acceptance for each and every one of us! In fact, He's already accepted us, and it's up to us whether or not we want to join Him eternally in Heaven. The world will reject us over and over again, but this place is temporary, and none of it matters, because we are accepted eternally by our Creator, our SAVIOR, and He will never, NEVER let any of us down as we seek Him.

2 Corinthians 7:4

"I am greatly encouraged; in all our troubles, my joy knows no bounds."

Circumstances so often are annoying and seem rediculously pointless. I have let a lot of small circumstances really discourage me recently... But you've gotta remember that the Lord created every circumstance, and will use all of them to better your character and strengthen your walk with Him. I know I've talked before about "all things together" and it's so true.... so we can find such encouragement, through those annoying circumstances that we're like, "that's stupid, why does it even matter?" or "why can't it be this way" because God knows they're not annoying or pointless, but for your betterment. Why? Because He loves us and has accepted us... So, as Paul did, we need to find joy in all these things, because we know that He works "all things together for the good of those who love Him."

Jeremiah 14:22

"Do any of the worthless idols of the nations bring down rain? Do the skies themselves send down showers? No, it is You, oh, Lord our God. Therefore our hope is in You, for You are the One who does all of this."

wow... I continually put my hope in my own strength or in the world around me to bring situations together, or "fix" things in my life, and all of it has left me HOPELESS... because it won't work. The world doesn't make things happen. God makes things happen. He is a great miracle worker, and I know that many of you have seen Him work amazing miracles in your own lives or in the lives of your friends and family. God is our only hope! He promises us great things! He promises us ETERNITY with Him! We have got to put every ounce of our hope in Him alone, cause there isn't any hope other than that... it all falls through because He's not in it!

Psalm 40

"I waited patiently for the LORD; he turned to me and heard my cry."

There are numerous, too many to count, instances in the Bible where God said "wait" and His servants waited patiently until He told them exactly what to do and when to do it. And what great blessings He flooded on them every time! Through waiting, and trusting in God alone, they came through each time... However, had they not waited on the Lord to give them His go-ahead and His plan, things would have been, and sometimes were, really bad (see Joshua 9:14, and following verses). The Lord blesses us when we seek His will, and when we don't jump ahead of Him, but we wait for Him to move in us and reveal somehow what He wants us to do. I'm waiting for direction, but that's not the only thing we need to seek Him in. This should be the first thing we consider before any decision, big or small... When we truly are living fully surrendered in the Lord's great and soveriegn plan, then we will know true joy, even in hard times, because we'll know "this is part of the plan... go with it..." As Paul told the Hebrews "do not throw away your confidence (in God)..... you need to persevere, so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what He has promised" and later encouraged them to "run with perseverance the race marked out for us."

So there it is.... I hope the Lord has enlightened you as He has me this summer... I never cease to be amazed by all He teaches me here.... all the way from cooking 75 eggs to major life lessons.... what a great God!

anyways, as always, thanks for your continued prayers... please pray for safety as these kids travel all over the middle section of the country in the next few weeks... we have 5 in St. Louis right now on a mission trip! and pray for the campers in the next 2 weeks also, that the Lord moves in each of them and they go home with a new found love for Him!

I love y'all!!

His,

Anna Kathryn

"I thank my God everytime I remember you;

in all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy."

-Philippians 1:3

Memorable moments... there are a few more, but we'll spare you the lengthiness......

Preston: "Jordan, can I borrow your helmet?"

Jordan: "Sure"

Peter: "You have a pink helmet??"

Jordan: "Pink is the new black, don't you know?"

Zachary, discussing dumpsters with the Oakrise guys: "I don't know why, but I always thought BFI was some kind of security..."

Me: "Maybe you're thinking of FBI?"

unfailing

"I'm floored by Your majesty,

You're the One that I adore,

You're the One I'm living for,

and I'm falling more in love with You, oh, my Lord.......

I bow and I fall, Lord, at Your feet again, Jesus

I worship, I adore You, You're beautiful to me..."

-Inhabited

this is silly... i don't know why i feel like i need to share with y'all what happened to me tonight, but i do... it won't take long so bear with me please....

i've just been in a panic the last week cause i lost my cell phone... ha! so many of you, after i got that tiny phone, were like "you're gonna lose it..." well... it took a couple years, but you were all right... i lost it... it has been such a hard week! i only know by heart like 4 numbers, and only 3 family members, my dad and his parents... so i've been even more cut off than usual.... i, and my friends here, have all prayed and searched endlessly for this phone... i can picture in my head the last place i saw it, at pleasent hill (the girls house) on the love seat arm rest.... it's been searched thoroughly 3 times... three cars have been searched and my room has been cleaned completely.... everyone who lives at pleasent hill has searched the whole house.... nothing..... i went over there today to do school with some of the girls and they were all like "did you find it yet?" and my response was completely hopeless: "no... it is gone, it disappeared from the face of the planet.... i will never find it, i have no hope..." that is such a sad and ridiculous response.... i should have known i would be eating my words by the end of the night!

what i did was give up.... i completely gave up on trusting God to come through on a situation of miniscule imporatance.... and if i don't trust Him in the unimportant situations, how am i gonna trust HIm in the really important ones? well... here's what He did about it: all the girls at pleasent hill and the interns and i are sitting in the living room for devotions tonight listening to this sermon on tape about trusting the Lord (what a coincidence...)... in the middle of it, i notice some squirming across from me on the love seat, and all of the sudden, shabre goes "i found miss ak's cell phone!!!" and holds it up! no way! we searched that couch! THREE times! so we all were super excited for a minute, then finished the sermon... then i reminded the group of my hopelessness, and the faithfulness of Christ....

here's the moral: don't doubt! don't doubt that God is teaching you something in really hard or just not so easy times, and don't doubt that God is powerful and faithful to His servants and will restore your hope and renew your faith in a God that makes miracles happen in times of despair! when you feel like you're starting to doubt the amazing power of Christ to restore and redeem, ask Him to remind you, because He will, and you'll soon be falling at His feet again, completely floored by His majesty!

hey, thanks for reading this totally random story... it's not like God doesn't teach me multitudes everyday that i could tell y'all, but i just felt like He wanted me to share this one...

i love y'all, keep prayin! we're goin to dollywood's splash country tomorrow to try out some new rides before the park opens... that is very exciting! please pray for us that nobody drowns! and, hey, give me a call and leave me a congratulatory message on getting my phone back and hearing from God! 678-617-3929 haha i may not call you for a week or so, but you'll know you made me smile!! this is so great, i am still in awe, i so thought it was gone........

"praise You, God, of earth and sky,

how beautiful is your UNFAILING love!!"

-Chris Tomlin

His,

Anna Kathryn

"I thank my God everytime I remember you,

in all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy."

-Philippians 1:3-4